Wednesday, June 24, 2009

The Odyssey Of The Heart

I flipped on the midday news today and instead of catching the latest healthcare debate or the stock prices, I watched “breaking headlines” about the governor of South Carolina. Just in time to witness the press conference live, I was drawn in.

I’d never heard of Mark Sanford prior to a couple of days ago when I saw a headline on saying that the South Carolina governor was missing. I read the article, which stated that he was MIA but that he was known for occasionally taking private time away from his high profile duties.

It seems the stories of politicians in scandal are frequent these days. Spitzer, McGreevey, Ensign, Edwards, the list of those in political power that have been publicly disgraced reads like the name of a law firm with too many partners. But today, watching Gov. Sanford expose himself and his marital infidelity felt different than others I’ve seen confess their sins from behind a podium.

He was candid. He was apologetic. He gave the watching world facts and details that he could have left out. He could have spun his statement in such a way so as to save face politically but it didn’t seem like he did that. The point in my observation is neither to judge him nor to pat him on the back, but rather to recognize truth that I can take away from this unfortunate scenario.

One thing he said was, “the odyssey that we're all on in life is with regard to heart”. That statement rings in my ears tonight.

Regardless of if your life is paraded in front of a national audience, if there’s few who really know you at all or if you fall somewhere in between, what really matters is the state of our hearts.

Part of my heart is alive underground, where no one else sees and part of it, once bound to a fake me loves to be free. Part of my heart has been dead and part of it has been in shreds.

It IS a continuing voyage to find ongoing restoration and life and to live from that place and that is something I needed to remember at midday today.

Deep Breath

The hiatus is over.

I didn’t know I was going on a hiatus before it happened but here we are nearing the end of June and the blog has been dark for almost 2 months.

Lately, it’s been a struggle to write so I’ve been avoiding it much like skipping over the questions on a test that I don’t know the answers to. I go back to them later, if there’s time but when it comes to writing, I have moved forward without taking the loop back.

Without answers, I wait.

If the human body is 70 – 75% water, then my life is 85 – 90% waiting. It’s a theme that weaves its way through my existence on a continual basis.

I am tired of waiting.

I want movement.